Thread for "SHORT" JOKES

[ovtvg]

I got some :

There are 2 cowboys in the kitchen. Which one is the real cowboy?
The one on the range.

Do you wanna lose ten pounds of ugly fat?
Cut off your head.

A Horse goes into a bar and the bartender says
"Hey buddy, Why the Long Face"

Q. Where do you find a one legged dog?
A. Where you left it.

Q. What's pink and fluffy
A. Pink fluff

Q. What's blue and fluffy
A. Pink fluff holding it's breath

Two muffins are in the oven.
One says to the other "God it's hot in here"
The other one replies "Oh no... It's a talking muffin"

[DeadPan]

I took the car to a garage in Wigan, I asked could he change the sparkplugs, he said are they Champion I said no mate they're f00ked!

[trevorlawrence]

Hi All,

Let me share few Christmas jokes with you guys.
Roberta was going to the Xmas office party but needed a new party frock.  So she went into M&S and asked the assistant, 'May I try on that dress in the window, please?'
'Certainly not, madam,' responded the assistant, 'You'll have to use the changing room like everyone else.'


Alex was five; all his Christmas presents were always signed, 'from Father Xmas.'
A little while after Alex had opened all his presents on Xmas morning, we became aware that he was looking quite down in the mouth for no obvious reason.
'What's the matter, Al?' I asked.
'Ummmm', replied Alex slowly, 'I really hoped that you and Mummy would give me something for Xmas'.  


Marge lost her handbag in the hustle and bustle of Xmas shopping in Regent Street, London.
A small boy found it and he returned to her. Looking in her purse, Marge reasoned, 'Hmmm.... that's strange.  When I lost my bag there was a £20 note in it. Now there are four £5 notes.'
The boy quickly replied with a charming smile and in a cockney accent, 'That's right, madam. The last time I found a lady's purse, she didn't have any change for a reward.'

Merry Christmas to you all in advance.
Cheers.

[jonerax]

Q:Why did the skeleton went to the movies by himself?
A:Because he had nobody to go with him